Mea Maxima Culpa! #Poutlander Hissy Fits, Hypocrisy, and the Nature of Fan Madness

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We don’t always do them in two posts concurrent to one another, however. I FLIPPED out yesterday when I found out the ridiculous wait between halves of a season. I’m still pissed and disappointed. It would be one thing to wait a year between seasons — I’m well used to that, as I watch other cable shows. But two halves of the same season is just excessive. Filming is done, and all that is left is post. I can’t imagine that taking more than three or four months, during which the cast and crew would get to rest. There is more to this than technical aspects that I may or may not fully understand — it reeks of network BS, and I HATE that shite. Getting screwed by networks is one of the BIG reasons I never bothered to really fangirl another show after the disaster of Buffy/Angel and the WB/UPN/CW. I wasn’t into Firefly first run, but there have been other shows over the years that have definitely been screwed by networks.

Honestly? I think Outlander is the first show I had any investment in that  I have watched first run for a long time. I have become a dedicated binge watcher, waiting until seasons are over to watch them. I’m looking at you, Teen Wolf, Pretty Little Liars, and Witches of East End, among others. I’m a reader, and as years go buy, I have decreasing patience for waiting until the next bit of the story.

I’m not embarrassed that I flipped out. Or flounced, or any of the other ugly fannish behavior I displayed. I was fan-hurt, and wanted some kind of reassurance, I suppose, from like-minded people. It was stupid, and childish, but there it is. It’s not the first time I’ve done it, and probably not the last, although I think this can be called “A reminder of the lesson you learned once already — DON’T FANGIRL.” My enthusiasm about Outlander is sort of diminished t this point, not to be (more) pouty. It’s just a fact. *shrug* I got  BJR warning shot in the gut yesterday, warning me what was coming if I didn’t back off.

I don’t know what the future will bring. I have a new novel to work on, two others to finish, and several short stories besides. That’s where my real focus should lie. I don’t know where I’ll be or how I’ll feel in April. But I guarantee 1. if I had known about this interminable hiatus when the show started, I WOULD have waited, and binge watched the whole season. I never planned to watch it to begin with, to be honest, due to my two decade concern about what an adaptation would bring, and 2. I can’t imagine still doing all the awesome hiatus activities I had planned for SIX months. I can’t even pay attention to my own writing for that long, I doubt I can hold onto excitement over a TV show, however much I loved it. I doubt I’ll even watch episode 8. There just doesn’t seem any point. I’m satisfied at the point where we left it — a much more comfortable “cliffhanger” for me than I’m sure they’ll cook up for the next.

Look, I can give all the excuses in a big, wordy box for flouncing. But the fact is, I’m spoiled, I appreciate my 1st World Problems over others I’ve had to deal with, and I’m free with my emotions. None of this reflects on Herself, the cast or crew (and people should really not be assholes and take it out on them. That’s lame.), it’s just a function of me and how I roll when I really dig something.

Above and beyond the announcement itself, the thing that REALLY pissed me off was the response of fandom toward people like me who were upset. WOW. I haven’t seen such disrespect in my life (yeah I have). It went far beyond just “I wish people would be positive,” or asking for explanations, or saying, “Aw, it sucks that you feel that way,” which I did get from a couple of actual fandom friends, it raced right into “SUCK IT UP, BUTTERCUP!” and “People should feel THIS! OR THEY ARE STUPID!” Territory. WTF? How fucking rude is that? I mean, I’ve seen some nitpicky Poutlandering that just pushed me over the edge *cough Ring-gate cough* but this is a big deal for some people. And I don’t remember implying that people were whiny babies or stupid for being upset (over such a tiny detail which the creators explained satisfactorily imo). I just told them to shut up saying it over and over and over and OVER everywhere in public. So… hypocrisy on one level. I can’t put my opinions ABOVE those of others. Which is why I generally just move along and ignore fandom reactions that I don’t agree with. Another lesson re-learned.

I’ll take Poutlander as a label in this instance. Sure, it’s only fair. But cursing at me? Calling me names? Telling me OMG YOU HAVE TO SUPPORT THE NETWORK OR ELSE THEY’LL START SHOOTING PUPPIES! Look, STARZ is shooting itself (not puppies, as far as I know) in the foot, not me. And they had enough money to make the show in the first place. My cancellation of a $100/month entire cable tier is not going to put them out of business. That is a LOT of money for my family, and I DON’T watch anything else on the tier (it’s full of porn networks, stupid sports, and music. I like to pick my own dirty movies, thanks). WHY would I keep it? Seriously?

This is how fandom gets out of hand, unpleasant, and ruins people’s enjoyment of the source material. And yes, I am including myself in that equation. The people who drive you crazy REALLY drive you crazy. The things that upset you get in the way of being in love with the show. I know, I have BEEN HERE BEFORE. A show that I loved, that I lived and breathed for years. The fandom crap, the BS from creators (which, thankfully, we don’t see here in Outlander), the deteriorating characterizations and storylines… eventually, the whole thing just felt like a chore, and it was like losing a good friend. As a supporter of a particular couple/character, I was harrassed, threatened, and attacked online (people, I’m talking EMAIL THREATS. TOWARD MY FAMILY AND MY PERSON). I was heckled when I sat on a CON PANEL in real life. There are hurty feelings all these years later (WHEEEEEDONNNNN! *shakes fist*). I haven’t watched more than an episode of my once-favorite show for years. My flounce was a sort of expression of seeing that heartbreak coming, the response of fans confirmed it, and I was doubly upset realizing — here I was again. A dumb sucker who bought the Kool Aid (that’s kind of an offensive metaphor, if you know the story) for an exorbitant price, guzzled it down, drank some more, and had my ass unceremoniously beat down and my wallet stolen for my troubles.

THAT’S RIGHT, MELODRAMA! EAT IT, BITCHES!

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This time, I can’t let myself get all anxious over a TV show. Honestly. I love it, it’s beautiful and a great adaptation of my all time favorite books, and Sam and Cait embody my favorite characters in ways I never imagined they could. But the fact is, it IS just a TV show. The books are the core of my love, and they are not going anywhere. They are not subject to the vagaries of networks, or the need for human beings to rest, recuperate, plan and prepare. (Which I do understand.) The books go as fast or slow as I desire. I can stop *here* or read all night. I decide the cliffhanger, or not. I like that control. I’m well used to waiting for Herself to craft the perfection of each story, and I don’t suppose that will change now.

I don’t know what that means. I will unflounce here, at least, and say I’m not stomping off in a huff, at least. I just have to do what I have to do, one way or the other. The ship will sail on, whether I’m on it or not. I mean… I’ll always be on the Ship, and I’m SURE I’ll be owning the DVD’s someday, or binge watching the season when it’s done. I just don’t know what I’ll do with the first run eps yet.

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So, I take responsibility for the flailing, the pouting, the general hissy fit, I acknowledge my hypocrisy, but I apologize for none of it. I am who I am, and sometimes I act like a jerk. Sue me.

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Made with my family’s tartan– Clan Eliot. The Skull and Crossbones is in honor of my mood, and my family’s heritage as MASTER border reivers– aka cattle thieves. They were even cursed by the church at one point, it got so bad. Follow the link to see.

Feel free to throw fruit, but not rotten bananas, because I have some of those I’m already debating on a purpose for. Thanks.

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